I recently stayed at a nice (or at least expensive) hotel. One disappointment was the very thin toilet paper. It’s ridiculous that they’d undermine the whole hospitality experience on something so cheap. The “luxury” experience was a fancy lobby and a cheap bathroom.
It really came into focus later, on the drive home, when a free gas station bathroom had my back(side) with noticeably better toilet paper. It still wasn’t as good as what I have at home, but it showed how bad (and memorable) the hotel’s supply was.
The Little Things Are the Big Things#
You’d think a hotel charging a few hundred dollars a night would want every detail to say “you’re worth it.” Instead, someone in a corporate office looked at a spreadsheet and figured out they could save a fraction of a cent per roll. Multiply that by thousands of rooms and it adds up for them. For the guest, it’s a reminder every single time that the company cut a corner and assumed you wouldn’t notice.
We notice. The lobby chandelier is what they want you to see. The toilet paper is what they actually think of you.
This goes well beyond hotels. A restaurant with beautiful decor and a dirty restroom. A car with a fancy touchscreen and a cupholder that can’t hold a cup. A website with a slick homepage and a checkout that crashes. The small, unglamorous details are where you find out what a business really cares about, because those are the places nobody’s taking pictures.
Ply, Explained#
If you’ve ever wondered what the numbers on the package mean, “ply” is the number of layers. One-ply is a single thin sheet. Two-ply is two layers pressed together, which makes it softer, stronger, and more absorbent. Commercial bathrooms often use one-ply because it’s cheaper and less likely to clog older plumbing. That’s understandable at a highway rest stop. It’s a lot harder to excuse at a place with valet parking.
Home, Sweet Home#
After the drive back, I made it home, where I control the TP budget and have a bidet. Home, sweet home!
If you’ve never tried a bidet, it’s one of the most practical upgrades you can make to a bathroom. Simple bidet attachments fit under the toilet seat you already have, connect to the water line behind the toilet, and don’t need electricity. Many install in well under an hour with basic tools. They’re common in much of Europe, Asia, and South America, and once people try one, they rarely go back.
The benefits are pretty practical:
- You’ll use a lot less toilet paper, which saves money over time and is better for the environment.
- It’s cleaner. Water does a better job than paper alone.
- It’s gentler, especially for anyone dealing with sensitivity or health issues.
- You’re less affected by toilet paper shortages. Remember 2020?
So the next time you’re paying for a “premium” experience, check the bathroom. It’ll tell you more about the place than the lobby ever will. And if you want a little luxury every day, you can install it yourself for less than one night at that hotel.
